Cloud Nurdz: The Synthetic Nicotine Future Is NOW!


As long as there's been nicotine, there's been a need for tobacco to get it. But, now—thanks to science—tobacco isn't needed anymore. TF (tobacco-free) is what they call the oncoming wave of synthetic nicotine that seems to be making its way into the market, across multiple brands. (It's also a lot faster to say and type 'TF' than 'Tobacco-Free Synthetic Nicotine' all day long when writing articles about the stuff)

Not looking to be left out of the TF game, (and they actually seems to be ahead of it at the moment,) is Cloud Nurdz; a popular e-liquid company that makes a lot of delicious juice flavors. They've got their own brand of TF, and they've already adopted it into some fantastic juices; both salts, and iced menthol flavors!

Behold! The Cloud Nurdz Synthetic Nicotine line!



First up is Grape Strawberry. This e-liquid is a delightful mix of two very popular fruits; you get the tartness of a strawberry, offset by the signature taste of deliciously sour grapes. If you ripped an innocent grape from its family on the vine, and then crammed it up inside a strawberry, this juice is basically the delicious, fantastic flavor your fruit abuse would create. And honestly, nobody but the grape is complaining. (Nobody listens though, because grapes can't really speak.)




Next on our e-liquid hit parade is Peach Blue Raspberry. This is a rather unorthodox juice flavor, but it hits smooth, and is a good balance of peachy sweetness, and the ever-popular, candy-reminiscent taste of blue raspberry. Blue raspberry always makes me think of cotton candy, or shaved ice. (Some kind of fair food, anyway.) So, when you put that tartness together with the sweet peach taste, it makes a harmonious taste in your mouth. (Where else are you going to taste things, right?) It's like you're eating candy while drinking peach tea on your front porch in summertime, and your grandma is screaming at you that "you're going to choke on those candies if you keep chugging that tea with them in your mouth, you reckless idiot!" Ah, summer...  and verbally abusive grandmothers.




Kiwi Melon is a good mix of tropical-type fruits. When it comes to e-liquid, kiwi goes great with a lot of fruits, and normally, it gets paired with strawberries for some reason. But in the case of this juice, it's really nice to see melon step out from the curtains and say, "Not today, Strawberry. This dance is mine," and then sweep kiwi off her feet, like in the final scene of a 1980's rom-com, where Kiwi was always Melon's first love, but the social status of the preppie kids at their high school kept them apart. But then they said, "To hell with what other people think!" and got together in the end. John Hughes would be proud.




Speaking of delightful will-they-won't-they e-liquid odd couples, Watermelon Apple has a great pairing, too. The crisp taste of a fresh, orchard-picked green apple, combined with the sweet summer flavor of a big ol' sun-ripened watermelon. Now, I've never fused a watermelon and an apple together to see how that tastes, but it sounds pretty good. How would you eat it, though? Would you slice it up and put a piece of each fruit in your mouth? Or would you cram a FULL watermelon into your mouth, like a drunken carnival sideshow, while holding up the apple and (through a mouth muffled by watermelon,) shout, "LOOK WHAT ELSE I CAN FIT IN HERE!!" ...Honestly, if you picked the second way, you're our kind of person. We can be friends. This is the juice for you.




Wait a minute... Grape Apple?! Uh-oh. Looks like Grape broke up with Strawberry, Apple broke up with Watermelon, and now Grape and Apple are on the rebound with each other! That's the basic premise behind the Grape Apple e-liquid; a fantastic combination of a pair of fruits which fit easily into your mouth. (It's also the premise of my pitch for the next big CW drama. Move over, One Tree Hill.) In this juice, you get the fantastic taste of green apple, and the pop-in-your-mouth tartness of sour grapes. (And with breakups like these happening on the show, those grapes can be pretty sour. Am I right, ladies?)




This e-liquid sounds like a pretty sour combination here, too. Blue Raspberry Lemon is what happens when you let two very charismatic troublemakers team up. Blue Raspberry is that classic candy/cotton candy/shaved ice flavor you remember from when you were young, and lemon is like a delicious glass of lemonade. Fun Fact: Pouring lemonade over Blue Raspberry cotton candy to re-create this juice flavor doesn't work, it just melts the cotton candy, and turns the entire flavor-testing lab into a blue, sticky, puddle-filled mess that your boss makes you stay late and clean up, because, and I quote: "Someone can't be a responsible adult in the flavor lab, and you ruin everything you touch. I'd never have hired you if your father didn't save my life during the war, you useless waste of company funds." Or so I hear... From a friend who is not me.




NOW we're talking about a dynamic juice pairing! Strawberry Lemon is a fantastic mix. Sweet and tart strawberry mixed with sour, delicious lemons? Yes, please! This is the kind of e-liquid combination that gave the world strawberry lemonade, people, and the world would be a darkened husk of despair without strawberry lemonade in it. Each flavor in this e-liquid alone is fantastic, but when you put them together like this, it's a party in your mouth, and everyone is invited! (But, at the party, maybe don't talk about Kiwi and Strawberry's break-up. Kiwi wasn't invited for a reason, and besides, Strawberry is with Lemon now, who treats Strawberry with the respect they deserve.)



Odd comedic tangents aside, this is exactly what TF was born for. You get some fantastic salts, some cool menthol juices, and you don't have a hint of tobacco to be found. The menthol juices come in 3 or 6 mg, and if you're someone who needs stronger stuff, the salts come in 25 and 50mg.

Fans of Cloud Nurdz can enjoy tobacco-free synthetic nicotine, and people looking for a TF brand to replace what they're already using can discover Cloud Nurdz for the first time. Give them a shot! They've got great flavor combinations, and more than enough TF to keep you happy.

Until next time, vapers!

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